Stuff I’ll Try Not to Do as I Get Older

As I begin my transition into the second half-century of my life, there are some things that… huh? Whaddya mean, I shouldn’t lie about stuff like that? Yeah, I know I’m supposed to tell the truth in these articles but that doesn’t mean I can’t fudge just a little once in a while, does it? Not even just a little bit? Once in a while? Well crap! OK then…

Having passed the half century mark some time ago (there… are you happy now?) I find myself thinking more about the years that lie ahead – and more specifically, about who I will become as those years continue to pile on. Will I be just another old person? Will I wake up one morning and find myself doing all those funny old people things that I’ve been watching over the past fifty… OK, sixty-six… years. Maybe. But I’ve thought about it and here are some of the things I’m going to work really hard NOT to do.

1. Make weird sounds every time I stand up or sit down.

Now I realize that I may not have a bunch of control over the strange pops and snaps that my joints produce from time to time – but I should be able to have at least some authority over the sounds that are rolling from my throat. Know what I mean? Just listen sometime to the weird noises older folks make when they change positions. Ummmph! Uhgggg! Augggggffffff! Ennnngh! Unggggh! I’m going to try not to do that.

2. Become so bored that I sit on the front porch waiting for a leaf to fall so I can totter out to pick it up off the lawn.

No kidding, I knew an older guy who did exactly that. Every morning he would make sure his little lawn was absolutely leaf-free and throughout the day, he would diligently pick up every single leaf that fell from the trees. OK, living in Phoenix, Arizona on a small lot with a half dozen orange trees didn’t mean he had to really scramble to keep up with the tree droppings so it didn’t occupy a bunch of his time. It was his focus though. I’ll try not to do that.

3. Tell the same story to the same people over and over and over and…

Yeah, we all have a tendency to lose track of who we’ve told what. And it’s not just jokes. It’s the significant events or situations that we’ve experienced over the years too. The experiences and memories, that for whatever reason, we want to share. I’ve known more than a handful of older folks – and a couple of younger ones - who seemed to continually push their replay button. I’m going to try not to do that.

4. Tell the same story over and… (just kidding)…

4. Develop a rigid daily routine and eating habits.

I’m sure you’ve all seen examples of this and not only in our older generations either. It’s doing exactly the same thing at the same time day after day after day. Up at six, breakfast at seven, read the paper until eight, watch “Mayberry RFD” until eight-thirty, etc., etc., etc. It’s the same way with the meals. Every morning – one egg over easy with toast and orange juice, lunch is always a small bowl of chicken noodle soup and half a peanut butter and grape jelly sandwich… BORING!!! I’ll try not to do that. (Tacos and chocolate cake for breakfast any one?)

5. Forget that I’m older than dust.

Two things here. The first is not trying to accomplish the same things at the same pace I did when I was twenty years younger. Mowing the lawn, trimming trees, painting, shoveling snow, lifting heavy stuff… An older guy could pop something doing that. So far I’m having no problem at all grasping this concept.

Second – remembering that even though on certain occasions when my brain is busily thinking thoughts of a twenty-year-old, my body is displaying all the signs of a pop-up advertisement for arthritis and incontinence medications. Yeah, I’ll still look and enjoy the scenery wiggling by – but there ain’t gonna be many lookin’ back. I’ll try to remember that.

6. Lose my sense of humor.

I understand, considering the usual aches and pains that tend to sneak up on us in our later years, that sometimes it’s difficult to just slap on a smile and press on. And we’ve all seen our share of growly, grumpy, snarly old folks. It seems to me that as we lose the ability to be productive or even to take care of ourselves, a good sense of humor may be the only thing we have left that is worth a hoot. This is a funny world filled with strange creatures doing goofy things. I’m going to try to remember to watch and enjoy them. In fact, I’ll probably be one of ‘em. I think you can count on it…

Gene Simmons, through NuPathz.com, provides an easy reading self-help blog, articles, quotations, thoughts and links along with affordable personal growth and self improvement books & materials - all designed to help folks find the road to a more enjoyable lifestyle, to pass on some of life’s “secrets for survival” in a chaotic world & offer a few smiles along the way. It's a down-to-earth, simple approach to discovering a better life.

Menopause And Depression

Many women experience bouts of depression as they approach menopause. As a matter of fact, midlife can be considered a period of increased risk for depression in women, the majority taking place in the years during the transition through the menopausal years. This period of time is associated with gradual declines in estrogen levels, which may be linked with the onset of depression.

It can be confusing when trying to determine if you’re suffering from depression, simply going through menopause or experiencing both. This is because many symptoms of menopause and depression are very similar, such as interrupted sleep patterns, fatigue, hot flashes, mood swings, anxiety and difficulty concentrating. It’s important, however, to talk with your doctor if you think you may be suffering from depression; don’t play guessing games with your health because if left untreated, depression can lead to additional episodes, which have the potential to be more severe. Untreated depression can also result in physical complications, such as heart attack and the loss of bone density.

If your doctor thinks that your depression is as a result of declining hormone levels as you’re approaching or experiencing menopause, there’s a possibility he will suggest hormone replacement therapy, which includes estrogen. It’s important to discuss both the benefits and risks of hormone replacement therapy, including potential benefits to your overall mood. Recent studies have shown that the risks of hormone therapy include heart attack, stroke and breast cancer, and some professionals believe that these risks may outweigh the benefits women can receive from this course of treatment. That being said, estrogen therapy remains the most effective treatment for many menopausal symptoms.

Short term therapy (12-20 weeks) has also proven to combat depression in women experiencing menopause. Especially effective are Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which focuses on negative thoughts and behaviors that tend to worsen depressed mood and teaches better ways of thinking and behaving, and Interpersonal Therapy, which helps individuals to communicate more effectively with others to help eliminate stressors.

Fortunately, the benefits of exercise in depression are well documented. Exercise helps with the treatment of depression by releasing the body’s mood-elevating compounds, reducing the depression hormone cortisol, providing a feeling of accomplishment and enhancing self esteem. I personally exercise approximately an hour most days of the week, but even exercising as little as ten minutes per day has been found to have beneficial effects for many women experiencing menopausal depression.

You may also want to consider a prescription medication to help you cope with the symptoms you’re experiencing. Discuss this possibility with your doctor because there are several effective and well-tolerated antidepressant medications now available. These medications have been proven to be an essential part of treatment for women who are moderately to severely depressed.

It’s also important to simply take care of yourself by eating a well balanced diet, decreasing your intake of refined sugar, caffeine, alcohol and chocolate. Are you getting enough sleep? Sleep deficiencies can make depression worse, so if you must, develop relaxing bedtime rituals, such as taking a hot bath or reading a good book.

Finally, just give yourself a break. Not only are you experiencing symptoms of menopause, but midlife also brings about life events that can be stressful, adding to the risk of depression, irritability and moodiness. Perhaps your children are leaving home, you’re caring for an elderly parent or have recently experienced the loss of a loved one. All of these events will undoubtedly add stress to an already busy life. Take time for yourself, eat a healthy diet, exercise and know that you’re a strong and capable woman and you will get through this.

3 Online Online Dating Mistakes To Avoid

While you search the internet for that special lady…the one of your dreams…your soul-mate…the other half of yourself, you can do a lot of things right. Sadly, you can, also, do a lot of things wrong….things that will guarantee failure and a broken heart. Out in the “real” world, being aggressive, demanding perfection and even little white lies are all ingredients for success. However, those same qualities are killers when you are dating online and off line, too, for that matter.

There is a big difference between being aggressive or confident and being too aggressive, over-confident, or just plain sleazy or slimy from a woman’s point of view. If you push too hard for a face-to-face, you will come across as too aggressive…maybe even, scary. Try to remember that you are not trying to close a business deal and keep the relationship progressing at a slow but steady pace. Patience is the key.

Nobody is perfect. We are all flawed in some way or another…and that includes you, as well. If you expect the woman to be absolutely perfect and demand that, you will always be disappointed. Demanding perfectionism in your work is one thing. Demanding perfectionism from a friend, co-worker or a lady you are interested in is not just fine. It won’t happen. Expect flaws and just deal with them. Decide the ones you can live with and those you can’t.

Little white lies and false fronts won’t work. Be honest from the beginning of a relationship. Write your profile. Make it interesting but don’t make false statements. The truth will come out eventually anyway. If you say you are a lawyer who makes a million bucks a year and you are really an electrician that makes $75,000, you have set yourself up for failure.

Remember…don’t be too aggressive, expect to ever find perfection or put on a false front.

How To Become A Super Affiliate In Niche Markets

Over the past years, web hosting has grown bigger than it used to be. With more companies getting into this business and finding the many benefits it can give them, the demand for web hosting has never been higher. These seem to be the trend of today.

38 million people have put up their very first websites online this year 2005 alone. It is estimated that by 2008, the internet sales industry will top then dollar bank. And to think, majority of those sites will be offering different Affiliate programs for people to choose and participate into.

This only means one thing. It is easier now to find the right web host for your application. The possibility of quality web hosting companies separating themselves from the rest of the industry is anticipated. If this is done, the unprofessional and incompetent ones will suffer.

Support will be the number one consideration for people when choosing a web host. It will be obvious that traditional advertising will become less and less effective. Most people would rather opt for the web host based on things that they see and hear. Also based on the recommendations by those who have tried them and have proved to be a successful.

This is a great opportunity for web hosting affiliates and resellers alike. There would hundreds of web hosting and programs to choose from that the difficulty in finding the right one for them is not a problem anymore.

How does one become a successful Affiliate in the niche markets using web hosting?

If you think about it, everyone who needs a website needs a web hosting company to host it for them. As of now, there is really no leading hosting industry so most people choose hosts based from recommendations. Usually, they get it from the ones that have already availed of a web hosting services.

With the many hosts offering Affiliate programs, there is the tendency to find the one which you think will work best for you. Think of the product you will be promoting. Pattern them to the site and see if they are catering to the same things as you are.

When you have been with one host for quite some time and seem not to be making much despite all your effort, leave that one and look for another. There is no use in trying to stick to one when you would be before off in another one. Things will only have to get better from there because you already have been in worst situations.

Try this out. If you are quite happy and satisfied with your web host, try to see if they are offering an Affiliate program you can participate on. Instead of you paying them, why not make it the other way around; them paying you. The process can be as easy as putting a small “powered by” or “hosted by” link at the bottom of your page and you are already in an Affiliate business.

Why choose paying for your for your web hosting when you do not have to? Try to get paid by letting people know you like your web host.

Always remember that when choosing a web host, choose the one that is known for its fantastic customer support. There are also many hosting Affiliate programs. Residual Affiliate program is also being hosted. This is the program wherein you get paid a percentage every month for a client that you refer. This can allow you to have a steady source of income. With perseverance, you can even be quite successful in this field.

There are a lot of niche markets out there just waiting for the right Affiliate to penetrate to them and make that dollars dream come true. Knowing which one to get into is being confident enough of your potentials and the good results you will be getting.

Web hosting is just one Affiliate market you could try out and make some good and continuous income. Just remember that to be successful on your endeavor also means that time, effort and patience is needed.

Nobody has invented the perfect Affiliate market yet. But some people do know how to make it big in this kind of market. It is just knowing your kind of market and making the earnings there.

Do Yoda Proud: Meditation 101

Meditation refers to a state where your body and mind are consciously relaxed and focused. Practitioners of this art report increased awareness, focus, and concentration, as well as a more positive outlook in life.

Meditation is most commonly associated with monks, mystics and other spiritual disciplines. However, you don’t have to be a monk or mystic to enjoy its benefits. And you don’t even have to be in a special place to practice it. You could even try it in your own living room!

Although there are many different approaches to meditation, the fundamental principles remain the same. The most important among these principles is that of removing obstructive, negative, and wandering thoughts and fantasies, and calming the mind with a deep sense of focus. This clears the mind of debris and prepares it for a higher quality of activity.

The negative thoughts you have – those of noisy neighbors, bossy officemates, that parking ticket you got, and unwanted spam– are said to contribute to the ‘polluting’ of the mind, and shutting them out is allows for the ‘cleansing’ of the mind so that it may focus on deeper, more meaningful thoughts.

Some practitioners even shut out all sensory input – no sights, no sounds, and nothing to touch – and try to detach themselves from the commotion around them. You may now focus on a deep, profound thought if this is your goal. It may seem deafening at first, since we are all too accustomed to constantly hearing and seeing things, but as you continue this exercise you will find yourself becoming more aware of everything around you.

If you find the meditating positions you see on television threatening – those with impossibly arched backs, and painful-looking contortions – you need not worry. The principle here is to be in a comfortable position conducive to concentration. This may be while sitting cross-legged, standing, lying down, and even walking.

If the position allows you to relax and focus, then that would be a good starting point. While sitting or standing, the back should be straight, but not tense or tight. In other positions, the only no-no is slouching and falling asleep.

Loose, comfortable clothes help a lot in the process since tight fitting clothes have a tendency to choke you up and make you feel tense.

The place you perform meditation should have a soothing atmosphere. It may be in your living room, or bedroom, or any place that you feel comfortable in. You might want an exercise mat if you plan to take on the more challenging positions (if you feel more focused doing so, and if the contortionist in you is screaming for release). You may want to have the place arranged so that it is soothing to your senses.

Silence helps most people relax and meditate, so you may want a quiet, isolated area far from the ringing of the phone or the humming of the washing machine. Pleasing scents also help in that regard, so stocking up on aromatic candles isn’t such a bad idea either.

The monks you see on television making those monotonous sounds are actually performing their mantra. This, in simple terms, is a short creed, a simple sound which, for these practitioners, holds a mystic value.

You do not need to perform such; however, it would pay to note that focusing on repeated actions such as breathing, and humming help the practitioner enter a higher state of consciousness.

The principle here is focus. You could also try focusing on a certain object or thought, or even, while keeping your eyes open, focus on a single sight.

One sample routine would be to – while in a meditative state – silently name every part of you body and focusing your consciousness on that part. While doing this you should be aware of any tension on any part of your body. Mentally visualize releasing this tension. It works wonders.

In all, meditation is a relatively risk-free practice and its benefits are well worth the effort (or non-effort – remember we’re relaxing).

Studies have shown that meditation does bring about beneficial physiologic effects to the body. And there has been a growing consensus in the medical community to further study the effects of such. So in the near future, who knows, that mystical, esoteric thing we call meditation might become a science itself!

Until next time, keep reaching for your fullest potential!